Healing Through Awareness with Shafer Stedron: How to Reclaim Your Story
In conversation with Shafer Stedron, we explore the power of self-awareness, emotional healing, and how to Reclaim Your Story after pain and trauma. Her journey from physician to life coach shows how courage, curiosity, and compassion can turn wounds into wisdom.
In this insightful episode, Mark sits down with Shafer Stedron, a neurologist, musician, writer, and life coach to uncover how individuals can rise above trauma and take ownership of their narrative. Shafer’s message is clear: it’s never too late to Reclaim Your Story.
Her journey from medicine to life coaching began after a personal reckoning realizing she had lost her autonomy, her voice, and her connection to self. The transformation came from asking a single question: “Do I matter?” That question led her toward self-awareness and emotional freedom.
Shafer explains that trauma often silences people, making them live in stories written by others. Through her work and her community “We Don’t Tell Our Stories,” she encourages survivors to rewrite that silence into empowerment and self-trust.
She reveals tools like the “But Wheel” and “Trigger Detector”practical frameworks that help individuals challenge limiting beliefs and manage emotional triggers. These tools help build confidence, courage, and emotional balance on the journey to Reclaim Your Story.
Mark and Shafer also discuss how self-regulation and curiosity can turn emotional reactivity into opportunities for growth. By learning to stay curious about your triggers instead of fearful, you begin to understand and heal the roots of your reactions.
Beyond personal recovery, Shafer highlights the generational impact of healing. By reclaiming her story, she also modeled strength and emotional intelligence for her children proving that healing yourself transforms everyone around you.
Through faith, purpose, and mindful parenting, Shafer shows that reclaiming your story isn’t about rewriting the past; it’s about reclaiming your power in the present and creating a future that feels authentically yours.
Key Takeaways
1. Self-Awareness
Shafer emphasizes that healing begins with awareness. Most people spend their lives reacting to the world without truly understanding their internal patterns. By turning inward and observing your emotions without judgment, you start to see what needs to change.
Notice emotional triggers without escaping them.
Observe thoughts as signals, not self-criticism.
Journal moments of discomfort to reveal patterns.
Practice mindfulness daily to strengthen awareness.
Self-awareness builds the foundation for change.
Self-awareness helps you recognize when you’ve lost touch with your values or voice. Once you see clearly, reclaiming your story becomes an act of alignment, not rebellion.
2. Emotional Regulation
Shafer calls emotions the “trigger detectors” of life signals, not enemies. When fear, anger, or anxiety arise, the goal isn’t suppression but curiosity. Emotional regulation is the bridge between reaction and response.
Use breathwork to calm racing thoughts.
Name your feelings to take away their power.
Respond instead of reacting impulsively.
Create daily grounding rituals (walks, music, silence).
Emotional calm builds resilience and trust.
By pausing to breathe and grounding yourself, you remind your mind and body that you’re safe. This state allows you to make choices from clarity rather than chaos.
3. The “But Wheel” Shift
Shafer’s “But Wheel” tool teaches how to transform excuses into empowerment. When faced with fear or uncertainty, most people say “I want to do this, but…” and list reasons they can’t. She suggests changing that to “I want to do this, and…” to open new possibilities.
Replace “but” with “and” in self-talk.
Catch limiting beliefs early.
Align words with intentions.
Take small, confident steps daily.
Progress is built through consistent reframing.
This mindset shift encourages forward motion. Instead of spinning in self-doubt, you lean into growth one “and” at a time.
4. Reclaiming Your Story
Shafer draws a distinction between rewriting and reclaiming. You can’t erase what’s happened but you can take ownership of it. Reclaiming means understanding the difference between what was done to you and who you are.
Acknowledge what happened without self-blame.
Separate the event from your identity.
Keep the lessons; release the pain.
Speak your story with honesty and strength.
Healing is reclaiming, not rewriting.
It’s about removing shame, keeping lessons, and choosing to live with intention rather than reaction. When you Reclaim Your Story, you take back authorship of your identity.
5. Generational Healing
Shafer believes true healing extends beyond self. When parents reclaim their stories, they unconsciously teach children self-worth, courage, and emotional resilience. Kids learn not by words but by watching.
Children mirror your emotional regulation.
Model self-respect and curiosity.
Admit mistakes and repair openly.
Show love through consistent boundaries.
Empower kids by living authentically.
Through her own transformation, Shafer empowered her daughter to write, serve, and lead. Healing yourself, she says, is the greatest gift you can give your family and the world.
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ABOUT SHAREF STEDRON :
Dr. Stedron opens up about the struggles she faced during her medical training, where she felt disconnected from her passions, and the challenges she encountered in a relationship that left her feeling devoid of autonomy. Through candid conversation, Dr. Stedron discusses the transformative process of reclaiming her story how she navigated the complexities of balancing a demanding career in medicine with the need to nurture her creative soul. She delves into the pivotal moments that led her to rediscover her love for writing and music, passions she had set aside in the face of professional and personal pressures.